Category: financial freedom

Frugal Friday – This is Dallas.

*Image found here.


We moved to Dallas 2 years ago next week. I was immediately overwhelmed by culture shock. In Asheville, most people that we know drive used cars and dress as though they are about to go hiking. Bathing is optional and there are more white people with dreadlocks per capita than anywhere else in the nation. Dallas is all about shiny new cars, high fashion, and looking put together. Jed recently commented that he didn’t feel pretty enough to shop at Whole Foods. He went there during the lunch hour and it was like a singles’ mixer for J.Crew models.
Needless to say, my Chacos, Danskos, and Crocs do not fit in here. There is a saying here that we quickly learned to say when we are shocked by the excess and luxury that surrounds us – T.I.D. “This is Dallas.” Take one trip to North Park Mall and you will say it a lot.
Don’t get me wrong, we love it here. We love our friends and our community, but we are still overwhelmed sometimes by the excess in this town.
The Dallas Morning News (our local paper) is running a series called “Drowning in Debt” that I love. It gives a great perspective on the debt crisis in our nation and in our city. I was not surprised to read that Dallas has the 2nd highest consumer (non-mortgage) debt of any major city in our nation. I think this has a lot to do with the T.I.D./keeping up with the Jones’ attitude. In this town the Jones’ are Jerry Jones and his crew, and there is just no way to keep up.
Here is what the Dallas Morning News had to say about debt in Big D:

For the last four years, Dallas-area consumers have been dogged by debt.
During that period, the area consistently has had higher average consumer debt loads and lower average credit scores than the nation as a whole.
Among the 20 biggest U.S. metro areas, Dallas trails only Seattle in average consumer debt, according to Experian, one of the three national credit bureaus.
Dallas-area consumers in March carried average debt of $26,599 excluding mortgages, compared with a national average of $24,775, Experian said.
The Dallas-Fort Worth area also has had lower average credit scores than the rest of the nation.

To be sure, many consumers find themselves deep in debt through circumstances beyond their control. Many lose jobs and struggle to keep up with bills. For others, unexpected medical expenses overwhelm their budgets.
But personal finance experts estimate that at least 10 percent of debt woes are a direct result of overspending – pure lack of discipline.
“It’s an epidemic in our country,” said Brad Klontz, a financial psychologist and co-author of Mind Over Money. I am finding that people with excessive debt associate money and material things with increased power, status and happiness, thus leading them to overspend.
Experts say several psychological motivators drive consumers’ urge to splurge, including the desire to fit in with peers, the need to relieve stress or escape from problems, and the sense that their self-worth is derived from how much money they have to spend. Sometimes, consumers overspend just to change the way they feel.


We have no debt and plan to stay that way. But, I have definitely made purchases to fit in and dress more like my friends. I shop at a certain overpriced store (that I love) because the clothes are beautiful and even a t-shirt from there is way cooler than the Old Navy version.
After college I bought a brand new car, because I thought I deserved it. I had to sell it one year later for a $3000 loss because I couldn’t afford the payments. That was a BIG mistake.
The debt that we had prior to becoming debt free was almost 100% caused by lack of discipline. We spent more than we made because we wanted more stuff. The difference now is that we have to get past caring about keeping up. I don’t know if we will ever stop caring completely, but I hope the feeling of being debt free will keep us going.
Have you ever bought something you regretted – either to keep up/look cool/because you thought you deserved it?



Frugal Friday – What a difference a year makes…

One year ago this week we were driving down to Kingwood, TX, for Jed’s ten year high school reunion. The photo above was taken at the reunion. Jed had been telling me about this guy Dave Ramsey who had a plan for our finances. We stayed with Jed’s brother Sam and his wife Michelle, who were on the plan. On the trip down we listened to “Debt Free Friday” on the Dave Ramsey radio show, and I cried every time one of the famillies screamed, “We’re debt free!”. Over the course of the weekend, with some major encouragement from Sam and Michelle, we decided to jump on board. We made a budget, joined the “Total Money Makeover“, and were on the road to financial freedom.

We cut up our credit cards and started using cash. We got serious about paying off our debts. In four months we paid off $13,000 worth of debt, and were totally debt free for the first time in our lives. Then we started saving up and emergency fund. You can read more about that here. We finished our emergency fund in May with 3 months of expenses saved in an account we don’t touch. In July we started Baby Step 4, investing in our retirement. We are also saving for our first house and for a baby.

I cannot believe that it has only been a year since we started this journey. I cannot express in words the freedom I feel. We don’t make very much, and don’t have much hope of salary increasing. I’m in full time ministry and Jed is a teacher. Even with our modest earnings, we have found financial peace.

Just so you know how we have struggled in the past, I’ll sum up a brief financial history of us for you. In college we both got credit cards in the student union for the free t-shirts. We both started off paying them off each month. Then I started using mine to travel, go to concerts, etc. Probably the worst thing I did was put 5 plane tickets to NYC on my card for my friends. When they paid me back I didn’t put they money towards the card. It took me 8 years to pay for that trip. I don’t know what Jed spent his money on, because we didn’t know each other then. He came out of college with a mountain of student loan debt plus his credit cards. I spent the next few years being consistently late with payments, dodging calls from creditors, and still spending. I bought a brand new car I couldn’t afford, only to have to sell it a year later for a $3000 loss. In 2003 I consolidated $15,000 of debt into a loan. I promptly began to run up more debt. In 2005 I consolidated all of my new debt, $12,000 worth. I paid all of my debts off by the summer of 2008. Jed brought into our marriage the $13,000 worth of debt that we paid off this year. Basically we were both not to be trusted with credit cards, and in a finacial mess. Now that mess is gone and we are free. I never have to worry about a creditor calling me again.

Do you budget? Tell me about your financial story.

Click below to make a quick budget for yourself.

frugal friday – date night

*photo from shockya

how do you budget for romance?

we are on a budget. we use cash only, and try to stick to that budget like glue. at the same time, we have to carve out quality time in our busy week to spend together, building this marriage and keeping romance alive. to keep the budget in sync with the dates, we have to get creative. our latest discovery is a dollar movie theater about 4 miles from our house. we will never be the first ones to see a movie, but that is ok. we went out to a movie, shared popcorn and a diet coke, and paid less than $10 total. the regular movie theater costs $10.50 per person here in dallas, $13.50 for 3D. that is crazy talk. that means we would be spending $21 for 2 hours entertainment without any snacks. no thanks. i’ll take the dollar theater any day.


here are a few more of our budget date ideas:
share a bucket of balls at the driving rangeoutdoor concerts (bring a picnic)the zoomini golfhikingrent a movie at homebike ridesfield trip to ikea πŸ™‚walking through christmas lights (in dec., obviously)

what are your cheap date night ideas?

vamos a la playa! – our vacation in mexico

we have been from our beach vacation for a week and a half.
i want to go back.
we spent a glorious week at the sandos playacar all-inclusive resort
outside of playa del carmen, mexico.
the vacation was our reward for finishing the first 3 baby steps in dave ramsey’s total money makeover. we are debt free and have an emergency fund of 3 months expenses. it was a difficult 9 month journey to get here, but we are so grateful to be financially free.

here’s a lovely little church in playa del carmen.

there were shows and live bands at the resort every night.

we ate waaaay too much, including these sweet treats.
i gained literally a pound per day.

these gorgeous orange flowers were everywhere.
aren’t they beautiful?! i love them.
laura over at gringation cancun is always posting pics of these trees.

the beach was rough the first few days with winds leftover from hurricane alex. things calmed down at the end of the week, and the water was perfect.
this was my first experience with an all-inclusive resort, and i loved it. it made everything so simple and affordable. we didn’t have to worry about making frugal decisions at every meal, and the overall price was really great. the resort really had everything we needed.
i’ll post more about the vacation later, i’m sure.
playa del carmen has now been added my list of favorite destinations.
here are a few others:
destin, florida
navarre beach, florida
barcelona, spain
madrid, spain
charleston, south carolina
gruene, texas
petit jean state park, morrilton, arkansas

what is your favorite vacation destination?

i’m linking to some great blog parties. check them out here.

frugal friday – an ode to aldi

oh aldi, how i love thee…
you force me to remember my reusable shopping bags.
you fill your aisles with cheap olive oil,
affordable frozen items,
off brand chips that seem glamorous and european,
and even organic produce that fits into our budget.

this week we found fresh organic strawberries for 99 cents a pound!!!! i am in love. the downfall of this little german wonder is that you can’t find them everywhere, you have to bring your own bags (which i appreciate), and you have to pay for a cart (you get your money back when you return the cart). also, you can only use cash or debit, no credit. yay!! dave ramsey would approve. they don’t take manufacturer coupons, because they sell all of their own brands. we shop there first, because you won’t find everything you need there. but, you will find some great deals on some of the items on your list.

currently, jed does most of our grocery shopping. he says i always come back with some expensive fancy cheese or an unnecessary baked good. so not true, but who am i to get upset when the man wants to go to the grocery store? he’s on summer vacation, right? might as well make himself useful. we make a list, look through the grocery ads, collect the coupons, and then hit the stores.

i was in no way compensated or coerced to write this post. it was written purely out of love for aldi, and gratitude for the amazing 99 cent organic strawberries.

what is your grocery shopping strategy? do you visit a bunch of stores, or stick to one? clip coupons or search the ads? share your wisdom.

frugal friday – confessions of a shopaholic

hi, my name is becca, and i’m a shopaholic. seriously, i have a problem. i love to partake in a little retail therapy when i’ve had a bad day, or really any day. we’ve been credit card free for a long time now, so that limits my spending. because of the strict budgeting, my new favorite places to shop are marshall’s, ross, and tj maxx. i have to tell you that i found the cutest mexican style dress at marshall’s for only $15.99! it has pockets and is perfection. i haven’t taken a picture yet, but i’m sure i will soon. the only difficulty i have at those stores is the search. i think you have to go in with a few items in mind, otherwise the madness and disorganization will drive you up the wall.

the dress is great, but my favorite thing to search for at those stores is… bras! i fell in love with calvin klein perfect fit bras several years ago, but they are pricy. they run $38-45 retail, and that is just too much. i have found many at marshall’s in the $6.99-$12.99 range. holy monkeys, that is a big discount!

my next mission is to find a new pair of jeans… i’ll let you know how it goes.
what is your favorite search item at discount stores?

frugal friday (just barely) – finishing baby step 3

yesterday we took another HUGE step towards financial freedom. we finished dave ramsey‘s baby step 3!!! this means that not only are we debt free, but we also have 3 months of expenses saved in an emergency fund. i cannot express to you how free this makes me feel. it took ten months for us to get through the first three baby steps, but it has been an awesome journey. we have taken control of our finances and are able to give more than ever before.

here’s the thing – i am TERRIBLE with money. when i left home for college, i made one bad financial decision after another. i maxed out 8 credit cards, bought a brand new car i couldn’t afford, and spent whatever i wanted. i consolidated all of my debts into a big loan and paid on it for several years. while i was paying it off i opened up new credit cards at gap, banana republic, old navy, and victoria’s secret, then got a new visa and discover card for good measure. i was basically a disaster. i was always later with my rent, trying to explain myself to roommates, and completely unable to get it together.

in early 2006, i felt really convicted and overwhelmed by the way i was dealing with money. i again consolidated my debt and cut up all of my credit cards. by the time i married jed in 2008, i was completely debt free. jed was a different story. he still had a few credit cards, a major loan from his parents, and the dreaded student loans. still, i thought we were doing ok. we were very frugal throughout the first year of our marriage, and never used credit cards. but, we still had all of that debt hanging over our heads.

last year we were introduced to dave ramsey’s ideas by jed’s brother, sam. he and his wife michelle had taken control of their finances using dave’s plans, and were eager to share the program with us. i fought it. big time. i did not want a budget. i did not want to sacrifice to pay off “his” debt, when i had already worked so hard to pay off mine. one fateful weekend we were driving to houston and happened to listen to dave’s radio show. it was a “debt free friday” with people calling in to scream, “we’re debt free!!!”. i was hooked. we started the program the next week, and the rest is history. we have found such freedom.

if you are drowning financially, or even just struggling a little, go check out dave. his ideas are not rocket science, just the common sense that we try to hide from as we run up our credit card bills. i am not receiving any kind of compensation for this post, just trying to share the wealth.

i’m linking to:
Join  us Saturdays at tatertotsandjello.com for the weekend wrap up party!

frugal friday – estate sale decorating

we love estate sales, and have had a lot of luck with great finds lately. here’s the big one…
isn’t she lovely?! we had an ikea ektorp couch that was great, but we needed more seating. jed loved the back support of the ektorp, and wasn’t liking anything else. please excuse the ugly rug. it belongs to our landlord and she makes us keep it to “protect the floors”. u.g.l.y. you ain’t got no alibi…
at an estate sale in a ritzy neighborhood, we found this bigger 2×2 ikea ektorp sleeper & storage couch. it is $1200 new, and the people bought it one year ago. they had an extra brand new cover for it worth $200. they wanted $800. we bought it for $600. cash works. we loaded that sucker in the back of the truck, stuck the wicker set up front, and rolled through the ritzy part of town like the beverly hillbillies. it’s ok, i’m from arkansas.
we called a friend to help us move the couches, and he bought our old one on the spot for $300. so, we basically got my dream couch for $300. amazing!
what is your favorite estate sale/thrift store/flea market find? what would you love to find? now i just need some new throw pillows…

frugal friday – dinner @ home

last august we made our very first budget as a family. to figure out how much to budget we had to look at what we actually spent in a month. whoa. it was disturbing. the biggest shocker was how much we spent dining out. oh. my. goodness.
we are both work full time, and often when we come home we are too tired to cook, and dallas has so many great restaurants. the combination was proving to be destructive to our finances. we decided to set a relatively low dining out budget at $150 per month. you can spend that much on one good meal in dallas pretty easily. when the money is gone, we are done dining out. we have stuck to it since then, and it has been good for us. it is very difficult, as i’m sure you know, but we are trying to cook at home as much as possible. here is a meal we had this week:
we had a big batch of fresh strawberries that we sliced up, for 99 cents a lb at aldi. i looked at bagged lettuce and it cost $6.99 for red lettuce and spinach. i bought a head of each for $2.69 total, and they made double the salad. i added some low fat feta and black pepper. we used balsamic vinaigrette one night and raspberry vinaigrette another night.
we also tried the barilla plus pasta this week, and it was actually good. i’ve had bad experiences with whole wheat pasta in the past, but i’m loving this kind. it has to cook a little longer, but that’s ok. we browned some lean ground turkey and added it into the mix. we tossed it together with organic vodka sauce and fresh parmesan. the whole shebang took way less than 30 minutes, and unlike rachel ray my lettuce does not show up shredded during commercials. i love dinner @ home.

dining out was our budget buster. what is yours? have you conquered it or is it a work in progress?

i’m linking to:

Friday Follow The Girl Creative

The Trendy Treehouse

frugal friday – cash money honey

i am now starting my 4th month as a blogger, and i’m trying to find a focus for this thing. i added a tagline to the top – living free in Christ and free of debt. i’m starting this weekend with a frugal friday post about the 2nd part of that tagline. what does it mean to live debt free, to me? freedom.

i am terrible with money. terrible. my financial past is dark and scary. i fought this whole budget thing pretty hard, until i listened to the dave ramsey show one time. i was hooked. i am a free spirit and thought that a budget would make me feel trapped and fenced in. in fact, now that we are on a budget i feel more free than ever.

we operate on a cash system now. i carry a “financial peace university” wallet that came with cash envelopes for just this purpose. it was really difficult at first to get used to cash again. i mean, has anyone used it since they first got a credit or debit card? no, ma’am. here’s the crazy thing – when you use cash, you spend less. it is science, people. your pain receptors (in your brain) are triggered when you spend cash, but don’t feel a thing when you use a credit or debit card.

with the cash system we are using, we do our budget at the beginning of each month. we then go to the bank and pull out the cash. it goes into our envelopes, and makes sticking to the budget so easy. if all the dining out money is gone, we eat at home. if all the grocery money is spent, we make due with what we have already purchased. if my “mad money” has dwindled, i’ll have to delay the purchase of that cute new dress. self control is a good thing.

you would be amazed by the looks i get when i pull out cash. people are annoyed because it takes 30 seconds longer, cashiers think i’m crazy. that’s ok. we are taking control of our financial future, and it is ok if others think we are weird. we are weird. normal people are swimming in credit card debt, and we don’t want to be normal.

what are you doing to be frugal? what system does your house use? i’m so interested in finding out what other people are doing. share your wisdom, friends.

here is a link to some of dave ramsey’s budgeting software: